'I was once scammed out of a lot of money': British expat recalls financial lessons

As the founder of Decluttr Me, Shelina Jokhiya has shed the mantle of a solicitor and worn one of “professional organiser”. She found a niche with the decluttering business in Dubai and has a weekly podcast called Decluttr Me to support others minimise their possessions. The British expatriate has been in the UAE for 19 years already and calls money “freedom”.

Dear Money, we’ve had a complicated relationship, haven’t we? You have the power to bring security, joy, and even freedom, but you also carry a weight that can create stress, anxiety, and sometimes even greed. I’ve chased you, saved you, lost you and worried about losing you, yet I know that you alone aren’t the key to true happiness. I’ve learned that you’re a tool—a means to an end, not the end itself. When I use you wisely, you help me build the life I want, support those I love, and contribute to causes that matter. But when I let you take control, I lose sight of what’s really important. So, let’s work together, but on my terms. With gratitude, love and caution, Shelina.

Complicated. Sometimes I love it and at other times I am frustrated by it. I am very fortunate to buy the things I want and enjoy the rewards of working hard doing something I love without worrying about money on a day-to-day basis. But as a small business owner, my income can be inconsistent, and after all these years of entrepreneurship, I still find it hard not to get stressed when things fluctuate.

It’s down to starting my own business and losing the regular income I had before when I was working as a solicitor.

Mostly my family as they are in banking and it is not taboo, but not something we brag about.

My father. He worked in banking and taught me to save and invest and never to waste money unnecessarily. Also, he always relied on cash, never debit or credit cards.

I was scammed many years ago in Dubai by people who I believed to be friends and I lost a lot of money. The whole experience was traumatic and I worked hard to get myself out of the hole it left me in financially and emotionally. I didn’t confide in my family at the time and I regret it every day. Now I do not trust anyone with my money except my family.

There have been ups and downs. I have seen extreme wealth while working in clients homes, and poverty in some segments of the community and appreciate what I have.

Save and put money into a pension from an early age.

Holidays — you get to see amazing parts of the world and have a break from the hectic pace of life here.

Buying expensive handbags and shoes.

Yes, I put money into my pension and savings, more so than ever before.

To buy a house back in the UK.

I pay into a pension monthly and transfer money to a savings account in the UAE and the UK. Saving as much as I can every month is a priority for me.

Being able to clear all my debts, especially as this occurred after I had lost money from being scammed.